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A new baby in the family! Yay!! Another little Kent is on his/her way to join this crazy group of people we call the Hutchinson clan. Personally, I can't imagine being Les and James right now, I don't know if I could handle having 4 little ones under the age of 6! I'm very happy for them, though, and my congrats go out to them!
I was telling my Mom the other day, I used to think that other members of the family having kids would keep the pressure off of me. You know, keep them distracted with a new baby, and people would stop pestering me with the perpetual question, "so, when are you guys starting your family?..."
I've come to the conclusion, though, that this is now wishful thinking; the tactic has outgrown it's usefulness, and now may actually pinpoint our child-less status, and generate even more questions.
Questions like, "well, Les has all these kids, when are yours coming?"
"Ethan and Micaela are both in school! Isn't it time you had yours?"
"You've been married for over 4 years now! What have you been doing all this time?"
Even my mother-in-law is getting in on the action: "So, are the babies coming before or after you move?"
To all those who think it is their business as to when (and even whether!) we have children, my response is as follows:
WE'LL HAVE KIDS WHEN WE'RE DARN-WELL GOOD AND READY.
A lot of people don't realise that their idea of being friendly and conversational can actually come across as quite nosey and intrusive. Another thing they sometimes don't realise is that seemingly innocent questions like, "Aren't you pregnant yet?" can actually open painful wounds for some. Did you stop to think that there may be extenuating circumstances that are, quite frankly, none of your business? Perhaps the couple have been trying to have a family for years, and have been experiencing the oh, so painful heartache of infertility. Maybe their dream is to have a family, but there are relationship problems that need to be ironed out before a 3rd person can be added to the family unit without there being a total breakdown of the marriage.
If you feel it's your place to pester, annoy, and otherwise be nosey, to someone regarding their plans (or lack thereof) for a family, maybe you should step back and ask yourself, "is it really any of my business?" Put yourself in that couple's place. If you were them, would you want every other person asking you the same question? I know, you're probably just trying to be friendly and conversational, but please, if it's me you're talking to, find another topic to discuss!
You'll know when (and if) I'm pregnant. I'll let you know.
Until then.....
I was telling my Mom the other day, I used to think that other members of the family having kids would keep the pressure off of me. You know, keep them distracted with a new baby, and people would stop pestering me with the perpetual question, "so, when are you guys starting your family?..."
I've come to the conclusion, though, that this is now wishful thinking; the tactic has outgrown it's usefulness, and now may actually pinpoint our child-less status, and generate even more questions.
Questions like, "well, Les has all these kids, when are yours coming?"
"Ethan and Micaela are both in school! Isn't it time you had yours?"
"You've been married for over 4 years now! What have you been doing all this time?"
Even my mother-in-law is getting in on the action: "So, are the babies coming before or after you move?"
To all those who think it is their business as to when (and even whether!) we have children, my response is as follows:
WE'LL HAVE KIDS WHEN WE'RE DARN-WELL GOOD AND READY.
A lot of people don't realise that their idea of being friendly and conversational can actually come across as quite nosey and intrusive. Another thing they sometimes don't realise is that seemingly innocent questions like, "Aren't you pregnant yet?" can actually open painful wounds for some. Did you stop to think that there may be extenuating circumstances that are, quite frankly, none of your business? Perhaps the couple have been trying to have a family for years, and have been experiencing the oh, so painful heartache of infertility. Maybe their dream is to have a family, but there are relationship problems that need to be ironed out before a 3rd person can be added to the family unit without there being a total breakdown of the marriage.
If you feel it's your place to pester, annoy, and otherwise be nosey, to someone regarding their plans (or lack thereof) for a family, maybe you should step back and ask yourself, "is it really any of my business?" Put yourself in that couple's place. If you were them, would you want every other person asking you the same question? I know, you're probably just trying to be friendly and conversational, but please, if it's me you're talking to, find another topic to discuss!
You'll know when (and if) I'm pregnant. I'll let you know.
Until then.....
Hey J9!
Well articulated! Since my sister already has the 4 kids (aged 6, 4, 2, and 0 !!) and has had them all in even-numbered years, I attempt to handle the "pressure" of doing "my part" with humour. (Of course!) So far I just say that she can keep the trend up stil 2010 or so, and then I'll see what I can do for 2012!
I get where you're coming from. I'm not even married and I get asked the same kind of questions from time to time. Weird, isn't it?
Well, stick to your guns (like I could stop you!) and feel free to knock me over the head the next time I ask "the question". Heehee. ;)
D.