J9's Property

OK, so some of you may have heard about the proposed changes to the Ontario auto insurance policy. If you haven't, the Ontario government is proposing changes to the "Accident Benefits" regulations - these are the medical benefits available to people who have been injured in a car accident, or for that matter, injured as a direct result of the use/operation of a motor vehicle. (this apparently means that if you slip and fall while putting air in your tires, you get the same medical benefits as someone who got into a major t-bone accident in an intersection.)(but I digress...)

Of course, as soon as this kind of news comes out, people start making comments about how we shouldn't have to pay so much premium because the insurance companies are all rich anyways, and insurance is just a get-rich-quick scam for insurance companies, etc, etc, etc....

It REALLY annoys me when people spout off about something about which they have absolutely NO clue whatsoever.

Newsflash: Insurance companies LOSE MILLIONS OF $$ every year in Ontario due to the auto insurance regulations.

How is it possible when we pay so much in premium, you ask?

Allow me to demonstrate:

Let's say you pay $1500/year in premium for 10 years. You have therefore paid the insurance company $15,000 total.

Then, you get in the dreaded fender-bender. Not a lot of damage to either the car or yourself, but enough that you need a body shop, some physiotherapy, and some time off work.

(in other words, a typical whiplash injury)

It might cost about $3000 to fix your car.

Then comes the medical treatment, medical assessments, income replacement benefit, throw in some housekeeping for good measure, and hey-presto, the insurance company has paid out $40,000 in accident benefits.

(and that's a conservative estimate)

Well let's see, so far the insurance company has paid out $43,000, versus the $15,000 you've paid them.

BUT, the accident was your fault. As a result, you get sued by the person you hit to the tune of $70,000. Paid, of course, by your insurance company.

(once again, a conservative estimate)

After all this, you've paid the insurance company $15,000, while the insurance company has paid out $113,000. A bit of quick head-math, and you'll realize the insurance company just found itself $98,000 in the hole on your claim alone.

(Don't forget, the insurance company also has operating costs to be paid: rent and maintenance of office space, office supplies, salaries for employees, etc...)

Getting clearer?

Yes, the insurance companies invest their profits, but I don't think they get a 650% return.

Please also keep in mind that the above demonstration was for a legitimate, un-inflated claim. I won't even get into how much money flies out the door on an inflated, fraudulent claim. (and the annoying part is, the insurance companies can't even do a whole lot about the fraud thanks to a very plaintiff-friendly legal system.)(but once again, I digress...)

I guess the point I'm trying to get across here is, please don't open your mouth to level accusations until you actually know the story. Yes, we all feel we pay too much for auto insurance. But please don't blame the companies that provide that insurance, and who lose money in the process. Let's blame the source: legal systems that allow claimants to get away with fraud (sometimes blatantly!), claimants who defraud the system, and healthcare providers who bill the absolute maximum they are allowed, often for treatment they didn't actually provide in the first place.

If you don't believe the part about insurance companies losing money, just take Liberty Mutual as an example. They sold their Canadian operations and got out of Canada because they were losing too much money in Ontario. I think if the insurance companies providing auto insurance in Ontario were to make their accounting books public, you'd be very surprised at what you would see. These companies might make some profit on other lines (ie. life insurance, disability, house insurance, business, etc.) but auto insurance is a guaranteed way to lose money, and a lot of it.

Still don't believe me?

Well, I guess that's your problem.

Just don't be complaining to me about it.

I'm getting the impression it's all about the bottom line.

Let's face it: you can't turn on the T.V., or walk by a magazine stand, without having the Gosselin family in your face. Jon did this....Kate said that....poor Jon....poor Kate....oh, but the kids got to go cake decorating!....

It's really a sad story when you think about it. A young couple, desperately wanting children but unable to do so on their own. Then Abraca-Dabra, they have 8. How are they going to make ends meet? How are they going to raise so many kids so close in age?

Then here comes Human Interest Corporation Extraordinaire (also known as TLC) to the rescue, and all their troubles are over. Let's make a couple of documentaries, the public would love to see this!

Well, the financial concerns are now taken care of, especially since Joe Public loved the documentaries so much, TLC made it a regular TV show. No more worries of the $$$ kind for Jon and Kate.

But at what cost?

What relationship can stand the test of that kind of publicity? I'll be honest: I don't watch the show. Neither hubby nor I could stand to watch the 2 of them snipe at each other constantly, although the kids were really cute. And now, the marriage is over. These 2 must now fight out their problems in full public view, while the kids watch in the background.

So, who's at fault for this spectacle?

Jon and Kate? They're human. They both have great attributes, they both have faults. They both have made some poor decisions, but then who doesn't? The show is a money-maker, and who can pass up that kind of opportunity? They can keep on raking it in, while the kids watch in the background. After all, they have a lifestyle to maintain...

TLC? Maybe they should have canceled the show when it became obvious that the family was going through some very significant issues. But come on, folks, the show is a money-maker! Why look a gift horse in the mouth? All this angst is great for ratings, you know!

Which brings me to what, in my humble opinion, is the worst part of the whole scenario, why the show continues to be produced, and why this family is continuing to air their dirty laundry in public.

Joe Public.

Let's face it: if people didn't watch the show, TLC would cancel it. But like a bad accident on the highway, we all feel so compelled to watch, to look, to see how bad it will get, how bad is the damage, how bad are the injuries....it's the North American public who should be ashamed of themselves for perpetuating this absolute circus.

And who's caught in the middle? 8 young kids, who's world is falling apart around them. They have become pawns in a horrible human chess game, where the major players aren't just their parents (as it is in most divorces), but you also have a major TV network involved and, of course, the public's insatiable need for real-life soap operas.

But, as I said at the beginning, I think it's all about the bottom line: $$$ for the parents (which they are now fighting over - big surprise?), $$$ for TLC, $$$ for lawyers, $$$ for advertisers,....

Some say that the parents are continuing with the show for the kids, so they will be financially secure, and so that they can have opportunities they might not have had otherwise. I think the parents have even said that themselves.

They might even believe it.

But is it truly worth it?

And should we, Joe Public, be encouraging them to do so?

OK, I really need to make more of an effort here!

A lot has happened since the last time I blogged. Connor will be 5 months old next week (!?!), the summer is already over, and Thanksgiving is right around the corner! Um, what happened to July?...

My wee boy is not so wee anymore! He got weighed this morning at breastfeeding group, he's 16lbs 9oz! He's also quite long in the body, so he doesn't look too pudgy...however, the muscular development in my arms has never been so evident...he's heavy to carry around, and he has recently decided that he is to be carried around from about 4pm until bedtime at 9! Any wonder I grabbed the sling I saw at Once Upon A Child with hardly a second thought!!

He's absolutely wonderful, though! He's been sleeping through the night since the beginning of July, and while it means he doesn't nap particularly well during the day, the fact that he goes to bed at 9pm and doesn't get up until between 7 and 8am means that not only do we get a full night's sleep, but we even get some time to ourselves in the evenings. (which, of course, is usually taken up with getting the tasks done that didn't get done during the day.....sigh.....)

But who am I to complain???? I've been sleeping uninterrupted for over 2 months now!!!!

Connor is generally a happy, content little fellow; although he does have his moments where he will whine incessantly to the point where I'm about ready to throw him out the window.....lovingly, of course.....but then he'll smile that big, wide grin of his and laugh that rather contagious laugh, and I just fall in love with him all over again!

I need to get some recent photos of him up here. Unfortunately, since Doug has been taking the digital camera to work with him, and leaving it in his truck, I have been using my big SLR camera....which is not digital....so all the photos are sitting on film, waiting for me to take the film in for developing. Who does that anymore???? Then comes the challenge of finding the time to scan them into the computer.....ya, I know, I'm complaining.....but until I get my own digital SLR, I'll have to make-do, I guess....

We were talking this morning in BF group about a woman in the states, who was fired from her job because she was taking "unregulated breaks" during the work day. The deal? She was going into the bathroom so she could pump for her little one at home! It's crazy enough that most American mothers only get approximately 6 weeks of maternity leave, but for the company to take issue with her pumping??? Times I am SO glad I live in Canada, where we get a full year off work to look after our infants!! Sarah, I don't know how you did it!

I can't believe I actually need to start thinking about going back to work. Yes, it's another 7 months away yet, but with the very large population of very young families in my new hometown, I need to start getting Connor on some daycare waiting lists pronto. It just scares me a bit - I have to find someone that I will basically be trusting to raise my child...because let's face it, Connor will be spending the majority of his waking hours with this daycare provider. I'm so jealous of the moms I work with, who are so fortunate to have their moms as their daycare providers! Not only are they saving hundreds of $$$ per month, but they know and trust the kind of care their children are receiving. It's something I really don't want to have to think about, but I need to get on the ball here. Staying home would be wonderful, but it's just not practical in our situation.

I guess I'll just have to trust that everything will work out....after all, it has so far, hasn't it?!

Like many people around me, I'm in a bit of shock that Michael Jackson has passed away. It really does seem that he has gone before his time.

It's been interesting to see the reactions of people to this news. Really, it seems that there are 2 extremes, with not much in between: he is either mourned, and remembered for his amazing contributions to pop music performance, or he is hated, and only remembered for the sensational stories of child molestation and plastic surgeries.

I have to ask, what is the truth about Michael Jackson?

Was he a perverted sex offender who just seemed to get away with it?

Or was he a young boy stuck in a man's body, who only wanted to have innocent fun with other kids, and to live out the childhood he was never able to have?

Was there truth to the allegations brought forth by the young boys and their families?

Or were they simply out to get a piece of the pie in the form of fame, publicity, and a lot of money?

I have to admit, the more I hear about M.J., and see footage of him off-stage, the more I like to believe that he was actually very naive, and never realized that what seemed to him to be very innocent, child-like behaviours (ie. having sleep-overs with other kids) could be mis-construed by other adults (and the public in general) as perverted behaviours for an adult man.

I mean, let's face it - the way he lived his life pointed to him not wanting to grow up...why else would he name his ranch "Neverland"?...

I'm not saying it's not a possibility that he was indeed a deviant who preyed on young boys and used his celebrity to "brush it under the carpet", but I have to ask again:

What is the truth about Michael Jackson?

Unfortunately, we will likely never know.

And as a result, I prefer to remember him as the amazing musician and performer that he was, and focus on that legacy.

Not the tabloids.

....and I'm a bad blogger!

I just realized how pathetically long it has been since I've posted on here! I guess I have an excuse, but when it's been over 2 months...

Connor Douglas Elvin arrived on April 21, 2009 at 4:31pm. A little ahead of schedule, but then not really -- he was only 4 days ahead of his due date; it was I who was convinced he'd be at least a week late!



I can't say labour wasn't what I expected, mainly because I didn't know what to expect. I can say, however, that it did not go the way I had hoped. For one thing, we had been told by our pre-natal instructor that only 10% of women have their water break spontaneously before labour starts. Apparently, I fall in that 10%! Doug commented that he's never seen me move so fast as when I bolted from the living room couch to the powder room when I felt a bubble burst between my legs...and made it there before anything hit the floor! It was then I realized that the strong Braxton Hicks with accompanying backache weren't Braxton Hicks after all...I'd been feeling them every 10-20 minutes or so for a couple of hours, but hadn't thought much about them.


That was about 8pm on the 20th. I was in for a long night, and long day the next day. My goal had been to go through labour and delivery without any medications or interventions. I especially didn't want to have an epidural. Well, I managed to avoid any interventions, but the medications and epidural?....well, let's just say, the back labour was the most EXCRUCIATING pain I have ever experienced in my life!!!


But, he was worth it! Connor is now 8 weeks old, smiling away at us, nursing like a champ, and growing like crazy! He was 7lbs, 12oz at birth (3540 grams for you metric types)....at his 8 week doctor's appointment, he weighed 12lbs, 8oz!! (that's 5760 grams)

Speaking of whom, I am being summoned as we speak...(maybe that's why it's been so long since I've blogged???) I must go and fill the hollow leg my son apparently has!

I'll try to write again soon, and keep you updated on his latest milestones and escapades!

Well, I guess you could say it's getting down to the nitty-gritty. Just a couple of weeks to go. I'm 38weeks today, and in some ways am SO ready for this all to be over, but in other ways keep thinking, "no, not yet!! I'm not ready for you yet!!"

We have moved! I'm absolutely loving my new house! The move went as smoothly as could be expected, we had some awesome people helping us, and some amazingly patient and understanding buyers of our old house. (I still can't believe how long it took to get all the old junk and garbage out of the old place!) (then again, maybe I can...)

Unfortunately, I haven't had much of a chance to really explore and get to know my new hometown yet. I've just been too tired! I finished work a week ago, but ever since then, any trips taken have been short, and I've been completely exhausted by the time we're half-way through what we wanted to accomplish.

Wee One is still growing exponentially, and still sticking feet/hands/bums out at every opportunity. People look at me and (a) can't believe I only have a couple of weeks to go, and (b) can't believe that (according to my O.B.) I'm actually on track to have an average-sized baby. (ie. 7-8 lbs) I guess they think I look small. I certainly don't feel small!

I think what's frustrating me the most right now, is that I feel like I can't be "myself". I'm so used to just going and doing things, getting them done, doing multiple errands on one trip out...but that's just not happening these days. There are still tonnes of boxes sitting around my house that need to be unpacked, or at least moved from their current location. Do you think I have the energy to actually take care of that? Add to that the fact that most of the boxes contain things like books, CD, or other equally heavy things - I'm not even going to attempt to lift them at this point. It's been very frustrating, as I've always viewed myself as a self-sufficient, physically strong person who doesn't need to rely on other people to do things for me. But, that's exactly what I'm having to do. I can't even drive somewhere to meet someone - they have to come pick me up, or Doug has to drive me. I actually haven't driven since my last day of work over a week ago.....

argh.

I guess I shouldn't complain too much. It's not like I've been restricted to bedrest, or holed up in a hospital room like some others I know/have heard of. But, still, when you're used to acting/living a certain way, it's frustrating to have to adjust everything.

Enough of this "invasion of the body-snatchers" - I'm ready to have my body back!!!

Warning: This post may contain disjointed thoughts, off-topic tangents, and incoherent ramblings.

Blame it on the preggo-brain....

It's really interesting what can run through one's mind when you're pregnant. It's also very interesting how reactions can change, and how out-of-control one can feel.

Man, I'm there!

This pregnancy has been progessing very well, I have to say. I'm 30 weeks as of today, only 10 to go! WOW, that's going by fast! Mind you, I only have to glance down at the size of my belly to know that...

But, I haven't had any complications at this point (knock on wood!!), aside from some, well, how do I say this.....digestive issues?....not morning sickness, never had any of that, but involving, well, the "other end"...('nuf said)...

This one VERY ACTIVE little one! There are days when Wee One just never seems to stop squirming, jumping, stretching...yes, we have discovered the joys of stretching out our little feet to see how much we can make mommy jump! Not so much a kick, as a foot suddenly pressing out on the belly so hard I have to use my hand to push it back in again. Not particularly comfortable, especially when it happens repeatedly in the same spot! Of course, Grandma is saying "Yes!!! Keep it up!!! Revenge is mine!!!!"

I've discovered that Baby Hiccups are very cute. At first. But when they go on for 10 minutes at 3:30 in the morning, they cease being cute. They become slightly annoying, and the predominant thought becomes, "can mommy go back to sleep now?....please?...."

I have become a total clutz. I drop things, knock things over, bump into things....and it's not the belly getting in the way, it's my hands! What in blazes is going on???? I've always considered myself to be graceful, well-coordinated, precise, etc. but now it seems I can't do anything the way I used to. I even get mixed up when I'm typing! It's like I've developed pregnancy-induced dyslexia or something, with the right letters getting typed, but in the totally wrong order...really slows me down at work, where my entire workday is spent in front of a computer. Argh.

It makes me realize that the upcoming Marked By Love engagements could be interesting. Donna's music is challenging at the best of times, but when I'm (a) out of practice, and (b) suffering from preggo-brain, I have NO idea how this is going to turn out. Guess I'd better start practicing...

I find it very interesting that everyone wants to know "how I'm feeling". Not that I don't appreciate their concern and interest, it's just interesting that the greeting has changed from "how are you" or "how are things" to "how are you feeling". Am I supposed to be polite and say "pretty good" or "not bad"? Be honest and say "sore, stretched, tired, and about to cry"? Or try to be funny with quips like "like an over-inflated balloon"?... Are people truly interested in how I'm actually feeling, or is it the replacement for the "how are you" greeting that doesn't actually expect a real answer and is only said to be polite? Are they being friendly, or nosey? Do they really care? Should I really care?

Ida know....

And just for the record, no, we haven't chosen names yet. The jury is still out. We have some names that we like, but none have really jumped out quite yet. We may end up waiting until Wee One makes his/her appearance, and say "what's your name? who do you look like?". And we could end up with a name that neither of us even considered. Who knows.....we'll find out in April, I guess.

I'm very interested to see how I will handle childbirth. I like to think I have a fairly high tolerance for pain, but I guess I won't truly know until I actually go into labour. Something tells me I will handle the actual birth much better than the after-math.

Speaking of which, I have NO CLUE how to care for a new-born.

This could be very interesting...

I guess a few of you may be wondering what's happening with the house...



We accepted a conditional offer 2 days before Christmas, and the offer went firm the day after New Years! What a way to start off the year!! The house was only on the market for 2 1/2 weeks before the offer came in, pretty amazing considering the time of year and state of the market these days...

The house-hunting then began in earnest. We were getting discouraged, because very few of the houses in our price range met all our criteria. Most of the ones with a nice-sized piece of property and adequate parking needed a lot of reno work (which I am NOT prepared to endure with a new-born!), while the new houses were on postage-stamp lots and only had room to park one car.

argh.

One very nice house did pop up on our radar, it was a 5-year-old house, on a bigger lot, and while the garage was only a single, the driveway had been widened to easily accomodate 2 vehicles, and the neighborhood was a really nice one. The problem? It was priced $10,000-$20,000 above what we had agreed our comfortable price-range was. But whenever I prayed about the house we were supposed to buy and move into, that was the house that kept popping into my head.

argh.

We did some checking around, and discovered that if we could talk the sellers down in price, we could probably do it, but we really didn't want to push ourselves to the limit in a financial sense. With Doug being self-employed, we really don't know what he's going to pull in month-to-month, so we really needed to be careful. It looked like it was "back to the drawing board"...

Then the price of the house dropped. As in, dropped $20,000!!!! If that wasn't a blazing message, I don't know what is!! We put in an offer immediately, since the sellers were having an open house only a few days later, and we didn't want to risk having someone else put in an offer before we had a chance to. And lo and behold, it was accepted!

The offer is conditional, so I'll wait for the conditions to be met before I REALLY start celebrating, but we are quite confident that there should not be any problems. I'll post pics when everything is firm!

As Doug has been heard to say lately, we're really being taken care of!

(BTW, if you ever need a GREAT real estate agent, I have a couple I can introduce you to!)