J9's Property

...but she always loved to tell me about it! I would have been maybe 3 or 4 years old, my parents were on faculty at Camp Selkirk music camp, and I apparently came running up to my Mom one afternoon and nattered away at her, while she and Jane were relaxing in lawn chairs.

Jane loved to tell me about that.

I have absolutely no memory of it.

But I have many memories of Jane over the last 8 years, since I started going to North York Temple. I was quite enamoured at first to find out that she was "that" Jane Clarke (now Jane Davey) - imagine! I was going to the same church as a well-known composer! I had sung her songs and arrangements for years in songsters, music camp choruses, youth choruses. I always identified with her musical style, especially the "jazzy" songs that I could have some fun with.

As I got to know Jane - her spunky personality, the strength of her faith - I stopped thinking of her as a well-known composer, and started thinking of her as my friend. She was a lot of fun to be around. One of my favorite memories is my last year on faculty at Jackson's Point, when Doug and I shared a cabin with Jane and Chris. I remember Jane commenting to me that she was so pleased when she found out we would be sharing a cabin, and I was very pleased too - both that we were sharing a cabin, and that she was happy about it!

Jane was one of those timeless people; you never thought about her not being there. I still see her at the piano at North York, I still hear her in the alto section in the songsters. When she stopped coming out to meetings back before Christmas, there was something missing on Sunday mornings. I kept thinking, "I can't wait for Jane to come back!" I miss her offertories ("It is no Secret" was a favorite) that people would sing along to. The "welcome" portion of the meeting just wasn't complete without her playing that one song...(what was the name of it? Something about "something special happening today" or something like that?) Well, the tune, and her way of playing it, is forever written in my memory.

I wish I could sit down and play those choruses like she used to. It would make the hole feel a little less, well, empty.

I had to smile when a friend turned to me after we had heard of Jane's passing, and commented that he wondered if the choir in heaven was singing one of Jane's songs when she arrived. I added, "and I wonder which one they would have sang?!"

If nothing else can be said of Jane, it was that she loved The Lord her God with all her heart, with all her soul, with all her strength, and with all her mind. And she told of that love time and again through her music.

Heaven's orchestra just gained another member. Maybe even one who will write new music for it to perform. And I can't wait to hear it myself!

...but it's still driving me nuts. Can't get the dates to show.

*sigh*

She's the one that inspired me to browse new templates.

And they're driving me nuts!

grrrrrr......

Wow.

I honestly can't figure out where the last 10 months have gone.

Can't say they've disappeared through a haze of sleep deprivation, considering Connor has been sleeping through the night (and we're talking 10-12 hours straight here) since last July.

It's more like a blur of firsts, celebrations, stroller walks, laughs, melt-downs, new friends, new experiences...

I thought a year ago that the future was scary. It looks a lot scarier now, with the new challenge of finding that "just right" person who is basically going to be raising my son. I wish it could be me, but unfortunately I find myself in the position where returning to work is not so much a choice, as a necessity.

In a way, though, I am looking forward to going back to work. I'm looking forward to regular adult interaction that doesn't focus on baby-related topics, looking forward to using my brain on a regular basis again.

But before that happens, I'm going to make the most of these last couple of months with my little guy, celebrating as he learns new "tricks" (he got himself from lying down back up to a sitting position for the first time today! Yay!), laughing with him when he finds the oddest things hysterically funny, smiling as I watch him with his Dad.

And I'll keep repeating Proverbs 3:5 in my head every chance I get.

"Trust in The Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding"

OK, so some of you may have heard about the proposed changes to the Ontario auto insurance policy. If you haven't, the Ontario government is proposing changes to the "Accident Benefits" regulations - these are the medical benefits available to people who have been injured in a car accident, or for that matter, injured as a direct result of the use/operation of a motor vehicle. (this apparently means that if you slip and fall while putting air in your tires, you get the same medical benefits as someone who got into a major t-bone accident in an intersection.)(but I digress...)

Of course, as soon as this kind of news comes out, people start making comments about how we shouldn't have to pay so much premium because the insurance companies are all rich anyways, and insurance is just a get-rich-quick scam for insurance companies, etc, etc, etc....

It REALLY annoys me when people spout off about something about which they have absolutely NO clue whatsoever.

Newsflash: Insurance companies LOSE MILLIONS OF $$ every year in Ontario due to the auto insurance regulations.

How is it possible when we pay so much in premium, you ask?

Allow me to demonstrate:

Let's say you pay $1500/year in premium for 10 years. You have therefore paid the insurance company $15,000 total.

Then, you get in the dreaded fender-bender. Not a lot of damage to either the car or yourself, but enough that you need a body shop, some physiotherapy, and some time off work.

(in other words, a typical whiplash injury)

It might cost about $3000 to fix your car.

Then comes the medical treatment, medical assessments, income replacement benefit, throw in some housekeeping for good measure, and hey-presto, the insurance company has paid out $40,000 in accident benefits.

(and that's a conservative estimate)

Well let's see, so far the insurance company has paid out $43,000, versus the $15,000 you've paid them.

BUT, the accident was your fault. As a result, you get sued by the person you hit to the tune of $70,000. Paid, of course, by your insurance company.

(once again, a conservative estimate)

After all this, you've paid the insurance company $15,000, while the insurance company has paid out $113,000. A bit of quick head-math, and you'll realize the insurance company just found itself $98,000 in the hole on your claim alone.

(Don't forget, the insurance company also has operating costs to be paid: rent and maintenance of office space, office supplies, salaries for employees, etc...)

Getting clearer?

Yes, the insurance companies invest their profits, but I don't think they get a 650% return.

Please also keep in mind that the above demonstration was for a legitimate, un-inflated claim. I won't even get into how much money flies out the door on an inflated, fraudulent claim. (and the annoying part is, the insurance companies can't even do a whole lot about the fraud thanks to a very plaintiff-friendly legal system.)(but once again, I digress...)

I guess the point I'm trying to get across here is, please don't open your mouth to level accusations until you actually know the story. Yes, we all feel we pay too much for auto insurance. But please don't blame the companies that provide that insurance, and who lose money in the process. Let's blame the source: legal systems that allow claimants to get away with fraud (sometimes blatantly!), claimants who defraud the system, and healthcare providers who bill the absolute maximum they are allowed, often for treatment they didn't actually provide in the first place.

If you don't believe the part about insurance companies losing money, just take Liberty Mutual as an example. They sold their Canadian operations and got out of Canada because they were losing too much money in Ontario. I think if the insurance companies providing auto insurance in Ontario were to make their accounting books public, you'd be very surprised at what you would see. These companies might make some profit on other lines (ie. life insurance, disability, house insurance, business, etc.) but auto insurance is a guaranteed way to lose money, and a lot of it.

Still don't believe me?

Well, I guess that's your problem.

Just don't be complaining to me about it.

I'm getting the impression it's all about the bottom line.

Let's face it: you can't turn on the T.V., or walk by a magazine stand, without having the Gosselin family in your face. Jon did this....Kate said that....poor Jon....poor Kate....oh, but the kids got to go cake decorating!....

It's really a sad story when you think about it. A young couple, desperately wanting children but unable to do so on their own. Then Abraca-Dabra, they have 8. How are they going to make ends meet? How are they going to raise so many kids so close in age?

Then here comes Human Interest Corporation Extraordinaire (also known as TLC) to the rescue, and all their troubles are over. Let's make a couple of documentaries, the public would love to see this!

Well, the financial concerns are now taken care of, especially since Joe Public loved the documentaries so much, TLC made it a regular TV show. No more worries of the $$$ kind for Jon and Kate.

But at what cost?

What relationship can stand the test of that kind of publicity? I'll be honest: I don't watch the show. Neither hubby nor I could stand to watch the 2 of them snipe at each other constantly, although the kids were really cute. And now, the marriage is over. These 2 must now fight out their problems in full public view, while the kids watch in the background.

So, who's at fault for this spectacle?

Jon and Kate? They're human. They both have great attributes, they both have faults. They both have made some poor decisions, but then who doesn't? The show is a money-maker, and who can pass up that kind of opportunity? They can keep on raking it in, while the kids watch in the background. After all, they have a lifestyle to maintain...

TLC? Maybe they should have canceled the show when it became obvious that the family was going through some very significant issues. But come on, folks, the show is a money-maker! Why look a gift horse in the mouth? All this angst is great for ratings, you know!

Which brings me to what, in my humble opinion, is the worst part of the whole scenario, why the show continues to be produced, and why this family is continuing to air their dirty laundry in public.

Joe Public.

Let's face it: if people didn't watch the show, TLC would cancel it. But like a bad accident on the highway, we all feel so compelled to watch, to look, to see how bad it will get, how bad is the damage, how bad are the injuries....it's the North American public who should be ashamed of themselves for perpetuating this absolute circus.

And who's caught in the middle? 8 young kids, who's world is falling apart around them. They have become pawns in a horrible human chess game, where the major players aren't just their parents (as it is in most divorces), but you also have a major TV network involved and, of course, the public's insatiable need for real-life soap operas.

But, as I said at the beginning, I think it's all about the bottom line: $$$ for the parents (which they are now fighting over - big surprise?), $$$ for TLC, $$$ for lawyers, $$$ for advertisers,....

Some say that the parents are continuing with the show for the kids, so they will be financially secure, and so that they can have opportunities they might not have had otherwise. I think the parents have even said that themselves.

They might even believe it.

But is it truly worth it?

And should we, Joe Public, be encouraging them to do so?

OK, I really need to make more of an effort here!

A lot has happened since the last time I blogged. Connor will be 5 months old next week (!?!), the summer is already over, and Thanksgiving is right around the corner! Um, what happened to July?...

My wee boy is not so wee anymore! He got weighed this morning at breastfeeding group, he's 16lbs 9oz! He's also quite long in the body, so he doesn't look too pudgy...however, the muscular development in my arms has never been so evident...he's heavy to carry around, and he has recently decided that he is to be carried around from about 4pm until bedtime at 9! Any wonder I grabbed the sling I saw at Once Upon A Child with hardly a second thought!!

He's absolutely wonderful, though! He's been sleeping through the night since the beginning of July, and while it means he doesn't nap particularly well during the day, the fact that he goes to bed at 9pm and doesn't get up until between 7 and 8am means that not only do we get a full night's sleep, but we even get some time to ourselves in the evenings. (which, of course, is usually taken up with getting the tasks done that didn't get done during the day.....sigh.....)

But who am I to complain???? I've been sleeping uninterrupted for over 2 months now!!!!

Connor is generally a happy, content little fellow; although he does have his moments where he will whine incessantly to the point where I'm about ready to throw him out the window.....lovingly, of course.....but then he'll smile that big, wide grin of his and laugh that rather contagious laugh, and I just fall in love with him all over again!

I need to get some recent photos of him up here. Unfortunately, since Doug has been taking the digital camera to work with him, and leaving it in his truck, I have been using my big SLR camera....which is not digital....so all the photos are sitting on film, waiting for me to take the film in for developing. Who does that anymore???? Then comes the challenge of finding the time to scan them into the computer.....ya, I know, I'm complaining.....but until I get my own digital SLR, I'll have to make-do, I guess....

We were talking this morning in BF group about a woman in the states, who was fired from her job because she was taking "unregulated breaks" during the work day. The deal? She was going into the bathroom so she could pump for her little one at home! It's crazy enough that most American mothers only get approximately 6 weeks of maternity leave, but for the company to take issue with her pumping??? Times I am SO glad I live in Canada, where we get a full year off work to look after our infants!! Sarah, I don't know how you did it!

I can't believe I actually need to start thinking about going back to work. Yes, it's another 7 months away yet, but with the very large population of very young families in my new hometown, I need to start getting Connor on some daycare waiting lists pronto. It just scares me a bit - I have to find someone that I will basically be trusting to raise my child...because let's face it, Connor will be spending the majority of his waking hours with this daycare provider. I'm so jealous of the moms I work with, who are so fortunate to have their moms as their daycare providers! Not only are they saving hundreds of $$$ per month, but they know and trust the kind of care their children are receiving. It's something I really don't want to have to think about, but I need to get on the ball here. Staying home would be wonderful, but it's just not practical in our situation.

I guess I'll just have to trust that everything will work out....after all, it has so far, hasn't it?!